Megadouche Strikes Again

I’ve decided that taking a break from illustrating the final drawings for my new book isn’t a form of procrastination — it’s a symptom of passion and kick-ass productivity.

Hmm. I might have to call bullshit on that one…

But whatever. The new drawings are so completely ludicrous, offensive, and ridiculous, that I had to take a moment to share something important with you…

I fucking rock.

Yeah, megalomania ain’t the most desirable trait in a human, but considering all the shit I’ve posted on this site in the last year and a half, why hold back now?

Sitting by my lonesome, sketching images of cats, wangs, and toilets, laughing myself silly at the stupidity pencilled to dollar-store paper, I realized just how much fun the entire process of compiling this book has been. Why I was hesitant to finish my final drawings is beyond me now. Momentum is a glorious force we don’t exploit to its fullest.

BonerFruit is still a young project, but it’ll go viral one day, along with the stupid books yet to spill forth from my keyboard. How do I know this? Simple, I’m fucking awesome. I don’t seek popularity to placate my fragile ego, I do this shit ’cause I love it. And I’m totally fucking hilarious. And fucking modest. To deny the world of my idiocy would be sinful.

Well, maybe not as soul-damning as coveting my neighbour’s ass (we’re talking donkey here, not the plump mounds jammed into skin-tight yoga pants), but a crime nonetheless.

Ya gotta do what you love, and if you’re not, you’ve missed the memo on enjoying your run on planet Earth. The stupid jobs sucking up our free time aren’t stupid at all — as long as you realize they’re a means to an end, and learn to treat them with as much silliness and frivolity as the projects you deem “meaningful.”

I have a blast at my slave-job. I hate to admit it, but it’s true. And even though I’d rather be writing and sailing the world, I know the burger-flipping is just another grand experience to be embraced, not resented. Living the moment is what it’s all about. Let me rephrase that… Living each moment joyously is what it’s all about. If you’re grumbling through each second of your day, you’ll end up a whiny, miserable fuck. So I say better to roll with the bullshit with a big smile on your face than bemoan why life has treated you unfairly.

Haha, I love this. I had no idea what was gonna unfold when I started typing this stupid post, but brilliance always seems to manifest.

More megalomania, but I giveth not a fuck.

I’m awesome.

If no one else sees that, there are no shits I will be giving. My head will rest easy at night despite my genius remaining unrecognized.

We all have something cool to offer society, so I say stop trying to fit in to whatever mold you think you should conform to, and let your madness run wild. People will always talk shit about you, no matter how wonderful you are, so stop trying to impress idiotic strangers, and focus on impressing yourself.

Geez, I always end up being a preachy asshole.

But you know what?

I fucking love it.

Back to crappy sketches…

What's on your mind?