Road Trip, Bitches! Part Rhymes-With-Whore

You know what’s fucking stupid?

Today I had glorious chance after chance after chance to stop at any number of unique Lake Superior beaches/rest stops/scenic lookouts/prostitute-friendly-zones/etc, etc, et fucking cetera, but I was hellbent on “making good time” while the weather and road conditions were in my favour.

Why?

I DON’T FUCKING KNOW!!!

I have zero motivation to get back to my shitty slave-job. I’m more than happy to never play the game of indentured servitude again. I talk so much shit about wanting to be free, adventurous, and ever spontaneous, but instead of listening to that ever wise inner voice whispering (sometimes screaming) into my enfeebled brain — “Mike! Turn here! Turn Here! You won’t regret it,” I just kept driving and driving and fucking driving, cuz a “responsible” slave-bitch gets back to work as soon as possible after a “holiday,” and doesn’t let the team down.

With gas-stops and coffee-purchases and random conversations with gay Dutch loser friends who have mental problems more disturbing than mine, it’s been a 14-hour day on the road, so I’m pulled over somewhere just west of Sudbury, calling it quits for the day and rethinking my motivations on Planet Stupid.

I kinda want to get more into philosophical ramblings at the moment, but I’ve learned my lesson about getting a blog post finished in a timely fashion when a shitload of irrelevant pictures need to be downloaded.

Well, not irrelevant, but conducive to “putting your money where you’re mouth is,” whatever the fuck that means…

So here’s how the Sub-Quest is going so far…

Tim Horton’s, Kenora:

FAIL!

Tim Horton’s, Sault Ste Marie:

FAIL!

Tim Horton’s, White River:

IRONIC MEGA FAIL!

Alright, enough.

We’ll see what Part 5 entails tomorrow. I may fake my death in the morning, but not committed to anything yet.

Cheers, freaks, see you on the flip side.